Percy Jackson Rant >:(

Warning: Spoilers.

RANT:
I hated the Percy Jackson movie. It didn't follow the book at all, most of the special effects were terrible, and they had the lightning thief as Luke Castellan. WHAT THE HECK?!?!?!?! There was no sexual tension between Annabeth and Percy (not like that, at least) until at least the third or fourth book. The epic claiming at the river? Gone, ignored. He never gets dragged into Tartarus by the shoes--he didn't even have the dream about Kronos or anything. There was this weird, random crap about having to go on a quest for the three pearls when he really just got them from a water nymph.

And they didn't even include the Oracle!!!! *brain explodes* Plus, they're planning on continuing the series. Like you could even do that when you took the first book and ripped it to shreds.

It was like a bad Fanfiction.

BULLETPOINTS:
Didn't Follow the Book

• Luke is NOT the lightning thief. EPIC. FREAKING. FAIL.
• It was all full of big doe-like eyes and lovey dovey bullshit from the first two seconds of AB and Percy being in each other's sight. WHAT THE HELL?? I love AB. She was like my idol when I read the books. She was extra sarcastic and awesome and kickass and--UGHHH. They ruined her; she's all...ewww. Ughhh.
• The awesome claimage at the riverside after he did his awesome healingness and awesome conquering? It was a no-show.
• Annabeth's flippant remark: "Like I said, I'm always prepared." TOTALLY NOT IN THERE. Instead, she was on the other team and was all GRAWR and poisonous.
• And then she randomly, out of nowhere, invited herself into his "quest," WHICH DIDN'T INCLUDE THE GODDAMN ORACLE AT ALL, when so far all she'd done was be mean to him. What. The hell.
• "Maia!" = nope. Instead, he has to take a running start. Plus, the flying shoes never spaz out on him (or rather, Grover) and almost drag him feet-first into Tartarus. Noooo, Luke just lamely cuts off the wings. Fail.
• Also, Percy never has any of his dreams about the icy, cutting voice or anything. There's no Clarisse, no Ares, no nothing. Oh my god.
• Practically the whole movie was this super retarded adventure thing to go find the three pearls so that they could escape the Underworld. In the book, it took Percy like five seconds to get the stupid things from a sea nymph that was all like, "Hi. Here's some pearls. I'm not gonna tell you what they do, but crush them when you're freaking out. :) Kbye." Which was good. Because the pearls weren't that big a deal.
• Instead, Luke gave him a FRICKING MAGIC MAP that showed him where to go. So Grover drove this broken-down old pickup truck at what seemed like the speed of light (he went from NY to California in less than a day. Way to go.) and it was all very pleasant with random battles for excitement.
• Lotus Casino = weird hot chicks giving them flowers, which dulled their senses and kept them there. Also, gotta love how they kept unneeded and pointless crap like the 70's guy (even got the year right, I think!) but they basically redid the entire movie (again: it was like a bad fanfiction).
• Major naughty tentacles goin' on with Medusa. That was so not how it went, either. And whatever happened to the bus explosion and their bags blowing up and all the drama of the journey? It was seriously just like "Lalala, driving down the road..." Oh, and Grover and Percy drove. Cuz they're supposedly 17 in the movie. Which means he graduates during the series. *headdesk*
• ...Persephone was creeping on Grover. It was so scary.
• Hades was a weirdo.
• THEY TOTALLY RUINED THE WHOLE STUPID BOOK IN THE FIRST FEW MINUTES. OH MY GOD. *dies* After the first five mins, I knew it was gonna fail...my soul died... :(

Special Effects Were Terrible

• When Percy was using the flying shoes, it looked so incredibly fake.
• When Mom was getting caught by the minotaur (which didn't look like a minotaur at ALL, by the way. There are pictures of them, Mister Director Dude.), it looked SOOOOO incredibly fake. Like, I've seen reeeeeeeally old shows with better special effects than that. No exaggeration, no joke. Not even kidding.
• Hades was a fail in general, but his flame form (stolen from a Disney movie, mostly) was really badly done. Heh, just remembered reading a newspaper article this morning, and Toy Story has far more epic digitalization than this movie.
• ...I can't even write about it anymore.

But Logan Lerman's hot. And there were some funny parts that weren't in the movie. And...yeah, that's pretty much all that was good about it.

If you couldn't tell, I'm seriously pissed. They just ruined the whole damn series. And now everyone who saw the movie first will complain about the damn books because the damn books aren't like the damn movie, when the movie was just an epic failure and the books are SO GOOD.

...I love my friends, though, and I had a really really really great day today. (: The movie just sucked.

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-Emilee

QUOOOOOTES.

- "...You drool when you sleep." -Annabeth. In the book. In the movie? HELL NO. BECAUSE IT FAILS.

- "No, no, no. Don't listen to me. That's bad." -Mitchell. xDD Ahhhh, Mitchell...forgot how hilarious he was...

- "I'm a pillow." -Aylin. ...

- "...Genesis?" -Miliano, Genesis's little brother. "Yeah?" -Genesis. "I don't get Aylin." -Miliano. "Me neither, Miliano. Me neither. I don't think anyone does." -Me.

- "...Seaweed Brain..." -Annabeth. But did I ever hear it during the movie? NO. NOT ONE DAMN TIME. *steams*

- "rohai absolutely LOVED the lightning thief!" -Rae's mom. "WHAT? WHY? HOW? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?" -Me. "I was kidding. She said it was full of fail." "Oh my god, I thought you were serious and I almost had a heart attack..." It's true. xD

California and Today!

Soooo, as most (all?) of you know, I went to California for the weekend. And it was awesomesauce. And I haven't posted for a while, so I'm gonna post about it. So yeah.

(Sorry in advance about the retarded sizing and the rushed ending!!!)

Okay, so when we got there, my cousin Nathan picked us up and we went to this seafood restaurant for lunch. I had some trout, and it was delicious. Then we drove around San Diego and stuff, and Nathan narrated our tour, and finally we got to the PETCO stadium, which is their baseball stadium. Which is on Tony Gwinn Road.
I went, "Who's Tony Gwinn?" since I didn't/don't know.
Nathan whipped around and went, "What?! How do you even LIVE with yourself, not knowing who Tony Gwinn is?"
I shrugged and grinned. "I get by."
"He's--he's Mr. Padre! He's... I can't believe you don't know who he is."
"...Mr. Who?"
Nathan did a mental facepalm before answering, "He's a baseball player. A famous baseball player. And you're hopeless."
So we explored the stadium, since it was open for some tour or another, and it was pretty cool. You could see the field pretty much perfectly from what would be a horrible seat in the Dome or (probably) the new stadium(s).

So then we drove around for a while more, going through Balboa Park and other tourist-y things, before Nathan decided to show us around the Naval base/port, which he's currently employed at (he's in the navy, was in Afghanistan and sort of in Iraq, etc., etc.). After he got ID'd, we drove around for a while and checked out the boats from afar. Finally, Nathan found his boat and we walked around that for a while. It was pretty awesome.

Then we left and went to my aunt's house and hung out and read for a while. And then I went to sleep at 10 cuz it was midnight technically and I'd woken up at 6 that morning. Soyeah.

FRIDAY

When I woke up, we hung out for a while, and Nathan went to "work," which was basically going down to the Naval base and calling people and chilling out on the boat for two hours. And I went outside and played soccer with Lucy, who's an ah-dorable Jack Russell and who can play soccer. Like, I'd kick the ball and she'd chase after it and whack it back to me with her nose. No joke; it went all the way back. So I ran around outside in the *cough* seventydegreeweather *cough* with Lucy the soccer dog , and eventually Nate (my Nate, not Spence's Nate :P) came home and we went to the beach.

Nate was being really careful not to get his shoes sandy because he'd cleaned them the night before. And that morning (after he got back from "work"), he'd chucked one at me and said, "Lace that for me, will ya?" So I did, but I was apparently doing it wrong because when he looked up, he made a hilarious face and went, "What are you DOING?" and took them back. (Emotes/actions/punctuation added for expressions:)
"Lacing them like you told me to?" /:)
"Well, you're lacing them weird. It's like...under, over, under, over." ?!
"So? It looks cooler than yours. Yours is boring." >:P
"But if I'm doing one and you're doing one--you gotta tell me what you're doing to it! It'll look so lame if my shoes are laced different." >:O xP
"A perfectionist, I'm not." *eyeroll*
"Well, I am." >:( xP
"You're such a soldier." >:P :D
"So what if I am?" xP
"So nothing. Lace your own shoe." So then I threw the shoe back at him. It was just really funny cuz he was all freaking out over his shoelaces...and his face was sooo funny... (:

ANYWAY, so we went to the beach and hung out by zee Pasifick Oshun for a while, and then Nate was like, "Oh! You gotta come see USD." So while my mom 'n aunt 'n uncle went to get lunch, Nate drove me to USD (University of San Diego) in his FREAKING BLACK MERCEDES CONVERTIBLE. Yeah. We got there, drove around and checked out its hugeness and fanciness and stuff, and then Nate got lost in the parking lot.
Cue facepalms.
"Um...sh*t. That's not an exit," he said for the third-ish time.
I rolled my eyes. "If you're lost, go ahead and admit it, Nathan."
"...Maybe."
We drove around for a while more before he finally goes, "Okay, yeah. I have no idea how to get outta here." And then we drove around some MORE, and he started going, "I'm lost in a freaking parking lot. I'm seriously lost in a freaking parking lot!" So, after ages more of driving around, he finally pulled into a slot and went, "Might as well get some culture while we're lost in the USD parking lot." He blinked. "Wow, that sounds really pathetic. Lost in a parking lot..."
So we went in and walked around, and finally got pointed to an exit and left. xD Gotta love 'im...

So after that, we went back to the beach to pick up my 'rents and Nate's 'rents, and then we drove back "home" for a dinner of steaks-on-the-grill and freshly picked tangerines from their tree, which Nate had annoyed me to eat for almost twenty minutes the day before. Dinner was delish, and then we went into the living room.

I read, and the adults (minus Mom, who was also reading) watched this war movie, which was a source of much amusement on Nathan's part. A list of his complaints:

The guns:

- "What the hell is that thing?! It's way too huge! How'd you like carrying that thing around in ninety-degree weather? Jeezus."

- "That gun is so last year."

- "We don't use those things! We used snipers and AKs!"

And this:

- "We don't go out with just one hum-vee and three troops. Just saying. Cuz we don't. I don't even think it's allowed."

And last, but CERTAINLY not least, the cussing:

- "They swear way too much in this movie. We never swore this much...out loud..."

- "New record! Ten F words in less than two sentences."

- Movie: "There's a man outside. He says he's got a bomb strapped to him." Nate: "Yeah, an F-bomb..."

Random quote from the movie:

- *people arguing* ... *still arguing* ... *still arguing* ... "WILL YOU FREAKING MOVE?!" It was hilarious, especially cuz I was just reading innocently when the dude screamed it...yeah...

Then the movie ended and we talked and laughed and hung out before I went to bed at around 11-ish.

SATURDAY

Woke up at 8:30, got dressed, and headed straight out to the prestigious Hotel Del for brunch, where my uncle was already waiting. We ate a TON of food, all the while being watched and attacked by StalkerBirds (seagulls, mostly), who would sit 'innocently' on a crossbeam of the tent we were under and then suddenly swoop down and steal some piece of something off of one of the diners' tables. They finally settled on the cart where all the leftovers were, and left us alone.

Then, with Nathan being very careful once again to keep his shoes spotless, we walked out to their private beach, where I (stupidly) started chasing waves and shell-searching and whatever, occasionally just letting the water slide up past me, soaking me up to my knees. Although I had rolled up my jeans, they kept slipping, and soon the whole bottom half of my jeans -- as well as my shoes and socks -- were soaked through.

And now I have to go to my concert, but basically we left and went to a gourmet candy store (yummm) then to the bay, where we went whale-watching (fun!) and hung out seaside some more (:D). And then at one point we ate at an Italian place and went to my uncle's work, which is a law firm with an AMAZING view of the skyline.

EDIT / TODAY:

Okay. I'm too lazy to redo the stuff that I rushed through (*points up*), but I'll do today's highlights. (: Here we gooo...

English was funny. Big shocker. Mostly Fraverisms that are impossible to explain/HTBT moments. Another big shocker. I sit next to Maximum. Again. 99% says Fraver did it on purpose. I'm with Maximum for my big Holocaust project. 100% says Fraver did it on purpose. He's actually not a bad partner, compared to some, but still. xP

Social studies was thoroughly meh. Huge shocker.

I DON'T HAVE GYM THIS QUARTER. I PRACTICALLY THREW A PARTY. :DDDDDDDDD YAY!!! Anyway. Health was fine; we talked about OA, which I might or might not go to. Probably won't.

Math was OK.

Science was SO BORING. We just took notes the whole time. Zzz...

Tech ed was actually funny, since Maximum and some others were sitting near us while we were working on our gear thingies (which I hate with a passion. I'm so not an engineer). We (me and Maximum and 'the others') had a lengthy discussion about whether it's really possible to be doing nothing. *nodnod* See "QUOTES!" for mo' eenfo.

Play practice was really fun today. We were doing a chase scene (fun but tiring) with lots of backstage time while we wait for stuff, and Tanner (hilarious guy friend), Whitney/Whit (friend), and Kirsten (friend from elementary) were all hanging out with me and being hilarious. I don't really remember how we got onto the topic, but Whit suddenly said, "Tanner kissed [somegirl] a few days ago!" Tanner just rolled his eyes, said, "I didn't REALLY kiss her. I did this," grabbed me, and dipkissed me. I was like, "Wow, Tanner," and Whit and Kirsten were like, "WOW, Tanner," and then he just went, "What? I just stage-kissed her," and did it again. *headdesk* xD It was hilarious, though, and he kept randomly doing it to me, Whit, and Kirsten for the rest of the time.

/ | \ -- |
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-Emilee

QUOTES!

- A bunch of stuff from Nathan. Read the post. :P

- "What if you're dead?" - Max. "If you're dead, then you're being dead. So you're doing something." -Me. "But...but...but THAT'S THE INFINITIVE." "Nuh uh! It's not 'to be,' it's being! That's not an infinitive." "...I can't believe we're arguing about English." "...Me neither. But still, you're doing something when you're dead." "No." "Yes." Aaaand so on. :P

- "Tanner kissed [somegirl] a few days ago!" -Whit. "I didn't REALLY kiss her. I did this. *randomly grabs me and stage-dipkisses me*" -Tanner. "Wow, Tanner." -Me. "WOW, Tanner." -Kirsten and Whit. "What? All I did was... *does it again*"

- Other stuff. I'm too lazy. :D